Couples Counselling

Couples counselling addresses the problems arising from adult sexual or intimate relationships. The relationship, rather than the two individuals, is the 'client'.  Marriage or partnership, is based on intimacy and trust. When it stops working we are affected deeply and our health and happiness suffer. Our sense of identity and self-worth often rests on the strength of our relationships and we can despair when our primary relationship fails.  The relationship that once recharged us leaves us drained and disappointed. Typically:

  • communication breaks down

  • sex has ended, desire has gone or sex causes problems

  • arguments are frequent

  • there has been a betrayal of trust, an affair or other secret

  • depression or other health problems recur

  • the bond of trust is eroded or broken.

Counselling can help with understanding the messages about conflict that we may have inherited from our family and offer new ways of handling this. Some possible causes are:

  • lack of negotiation can shatter expectations

  • stress or illness can fracture a relationship

  • depression can leave a partner feeling deserted

  • external pressures can sever the couple bond

  • children leaving home can allow resentments to resurface.

How can couples counselling help?

  • destructive patterns of relating can be recognised and addressed

  • conflict and communication can be improved

  • new relationship skills can be learned.

  • the impact of change and loss can be examined and integrated

  • Sexual issues can often be resolved.

Sex can be a source of great enjoyment within a long-term relationship and any problems it poses can leave one or both partners feeling rejected or angry. Loss of desire is often an early sign of problems.   Psychosexual issues can cause problems within the relationship or arise like childhood sexual abuse for instance from the past.

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